Tips for Dating a Dominatrix

Some tips for anyone dating (or thinking of dating) a professional Dominatrix, from an opinionated submissive.

  1. She’s a person, not a fantasy. If your expectations for being in her company are the same as your expectations for a paid session, you will likely disappoint each other. In most paid situations, the domme is there to fulfill your fantasies; in an actual relationship, fantasy fulfillment is only part of the relationship, and it should be much more mutual.
  2. Be honest about what you want. Even if you both choose a full time, 24/7 Mistress/slave relationship, both you and your domme are real human beings with basic needs. It may be hot to imagine a life of being ignored or kept in a cage, but that may not be what you really want from each other on a day to day basis.
  3. Be supportive, not judgemental. Resist the temptation to psychoanalyze her. As you become closer you will no doubt explore each others’ minds, and learn more about how each other “ticks” — experience this naturally rather than making assumptions.
  4. Remember, you’re both individuals. Not all dommes are the same, nor are all subs or slaves. Take the time to learn about each other as individuals, with real desires and needs that can’t always be neatly contained by labels.

Have you dated a Pro Domme? Or, are you also an opinionated submissive who thinks S/he might have some good suggestions? Let us know in the Comments section! We read and respond to [almost] all comments.

– petdj (aka whisky)

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