Breaking the Fourth Wall
Many Women sell the image of the perfect FemDom Goddess. Most of them also offer the entire perfect FemDom experience – the marketing, the look, the fetishes – they are all carefully constructed to reflect back to the consumer the very things he wants the most. (Let Me shatter your fantasy for a second: this business is no different than other business, and you are consumers and we are providers). I call this “a la carte FemDom.” It is a fine business strategy, and those Women who can hone in on the target market are brilliant business Women for doing so. They are selling an experience, you are buying it, and they should get paid handsomely for it, because doing it well requires both artistry and shrewdness – a rare combination of skills.
And all of us ProDommes do something your grade school teacher taught you: “show, don’t tell.” We all carefully curate our marketing presence to send a particular message: one of us is elegant, sexy, and exclusive; another is a flirty, kinky, indulge-all-your-fantasies girl-next-door; and another still is a sadistic and legendary destroyer of men’s assholes. Few of us offer something more than a cliché in that presentation (because men are predictable and clichés pay the bill$$$), and even fewer of us break that fourth wall by offering you, our clients, meta-insight into the machination of Pro-Domming. You’ll rarely see this kind of blog post on someone’s commercial website – but if you seek it out, you’ll easily find it on any sexworker-oriented site. This is because that kind of commentary usually falls on deaf ears, ruins the fantasy (i.e. the money-generator), and reminds Me of that biblical quote I love about porcine nacre waste.
You could say that My cliché, if you can call it such, is “Female Supremacist” and maybe “sexwork advocate.” Many of the Women who invoke the previously mentioned archetypes are also sexwork advocates, but choose to separate that activism from their commercial practice. In reality, there’s a good chance that their being more outspoken or transparent about their views might cost them income. Yet I choose to break that fourth wall anyway. Maybe I prefer My consumers informed? Maybe I think it’s to your benefit that you hear Our struggle.
I’m grateful that My initial exposure to FemDom was in the lifestyle, sparked in large part by a sincere Female Supremacist. This experience has allowed Me to bring My commercial practice in line with My lifestyle practice. This work is about so much more than money. Not to say it’s *just* about the money for more commercially-oriented Women, nor that there is anything wrong with this career choice being (like many other career choices), even primarily about money.
For Me, it is about a vision of the world, and a way of life. With Me, you don’t get the girl-next-door who puts on a “Dominatrix outfit” and pretends to have a mean streak only to, essentially, accommodate you. Not that I’ve never been that girl: when I was still learning the ropes of commercial practice, in My “house” days, I had to be – because it was a time when My income depended solely on commercial FemDom.
And I was damn good at it, if I do say so Myself. In fact, some Women are stellar at making you believe that they believe, even when they don’t. That’s one of the skills of our craft – we’re fantasy makers. (I’m sure you can relate – I bet you’ve had a job or two where you used all the diplomacy at your disposal because it was a job you rather liked.)
The fact that these Women are accommodating, and less about “Female Supremacy” than about gettin’ that paper by no means lessens the sincerity or validity of what they do. And if you can’t tell the damn difference, who the hell gives a flying fuck whether they’re Female Supremacists or just GREAT performers? Anyone who questions this should be locked in a sensory deprivation cell and be made to listen to Valerie Solanas’ SCUM Manifesto on repeat for a minimum of two weeks, 24/7.
And it’s not that I’m *never* accommodating, either. It sometimes makes sense, or can even give Me pleasure to be so. But My revenue streams are diversified and don’t come from FemDom alone, which means I’m in a privileged position that gives Me the latitude to run sessions exactly according to My vision of the world (with clients who (hopefully) “get it”), and turn down sessions that don’t match My interests.
Let Me be very, VERY clear: we should EXALT the Women who have figured out how to monetize guys’ horniness and the many wankers on the interwebs. There is 100%, absolutely EVERYTHING RIGHT with that.
However, I’d like to bring something a little more lifestyle-like: I will *not* take every and any session. I will *not* cater to fetish interests that don’t align with My specific politics around play (this includes etiquette). I will *not* merely indulge your desires in order to extract your money from you.
In order to pique My interest, your interests must be concordant with My views on FemDom. I am not the kinky girl next door selling you her foot pictures because (let’s face it) there’s money to be made in guys’ horniness. The Princess Marx Experience is a reflection of who I actually am – My beliefs, My art, My politics. Where for some, FemDom is a way to pay the bills and support another art, My FemDom *is* My art. In fact, in a way, you might say my vanilla career supports My FemDom art – and allows Me to practice it in a way that feels authentic to Me. It is an art, a politics, and a lifestyle. It is those that set even the commercial “Princess Marx Experience” apart from the rest.
Why, don’t mind if I do
Does that mean I won’t take simple foot worship sessions, or ones where My subject is not quite the Female Supremacist I wish every person to be? Absolutely not. I will BE one of those Women I mentioned, and I will take your money – and enjoy it. (Unless you’re offensive or not worth the trouble.) But who doesn’t enjoy sitting back and letting their feet be rubbed? And who doesn’t enjoy being paid for something they like doing?
It’s tempting to think that to some degree, we are all beholden to the hand that feeds. But if you carefully ponder what I wrote in the last paragraph, you’ll quickly realize that the contract into which you and I enter when we session is a professional one: I’m happy to provide a service with professionalism, to clients who show similar respect and professionalism. And, as FemDom is both My politics and My art, it is My mission to make sure you, My servant, are beholden to Me, and not the other way around.
May We be ever steady in our course, and ever true in our ways.
Except for this election – elect Bernie this time.